Normal on the Outside, Pain on the Inside!

I keep seeing all these posts on facebook about how people don't understand the issues people deal with when they look normal on the outside but they feel bad on the inside.  The post said:

"It's hard to explain to someone who has no clue. It's a daily struggle feeling sick on the inside while you look fine on the outside. Please put this as your status for at least 1 hour if you or someone you know has an invisible illness (Anxiety, Depression, Hypo/Hyperthyoidism, Diabetes, LUPUS, Fibromyalgia, Crohn's, MS, Arthritis, Cancer, Heart Disease, etc.) Never judge what you don't understand"

I totally get that post! It's so me! Ever since yesterday, I've had the mystery chest and arm pain that no one has been able to figure out. They say it could be tissue inflammation or fibromyalgia, but no one has been able to do anything to stop it or make it better.  It just has to run it's course.  In the winter, the pain is worse, and I spend days feeling horrible!

I am at a loss. I have seen at least 6 doctors over the past 2 years, have had a stress test, echo, CAT scans, MRIs, x-rays...it seems like this is never going to go away! It's so depressing when I get the pain.  It comes out of nowhere and stays for as long as it feels like being here.  I have yet to figure out what the trigger of it is. I often sit and wonder what I was doing when the pain started.  It's never anything exciting, I'm usually sitting at the computer or relaxing on the couch.  The worst part of it all is that from second to second, I never know how I am going to feel. It fluctuates so much! I could feel great one minute and the next minute, I'm in pain, feeling light headed, and all I want to do is lay down. Five minutes later, I could feel better again. It makes it really difficult for me to plan things.

I force myself to keep going, to keep doing the things I want to do, to keep working towards my black belt and stay active. There are days when I am completely useless because the pain takes over and I just can't do anything because I will be in more pain if I do.  I have learned my limits somewhat, and know what makes the pain worse, but I have yet to find what makes it better. Medications don't work, massage works while it is happening and once it stops the pain comes back (I haven't gotten a professional massage though so that could be why it comes back after), resting doesn't even work! Doctors here have been no use! It's so frustrating!

I hope to figure this out sometime soon. I'm sick of this getting in the way of my life and me forcing myself to just get through it even though I feel horrible. I want to feel normal again! I want the quality of my life to be good.  Someday...